If you’re honest,  you’ll admit to having a quick peek into the toilet after leaving a load, right?  Well, I had a peek today and was convinced that I was in trouble.  I’ve been told if it looks really dark, you’d better see the doctor for a check.

So off I went to call to make an appointment while visions of horrible poop chute ailments reeled around in my head.  I was able to get an appointment for tomorrow and was really pleased with the concern of the receptionist at the doctor’s office.

Later I was sitting around just mulling what might be the end of my life. (do I sound wacky to you too?)  I remembered that I felt homesick for the kids in Atlanta and Orlando the night before and THAT’S when it hit me.  I wasn’t dying at all.

You see, when I get homesick I eat American food.  It’s just something I’ve always done.  It makes me feel closer I suppose.  Well, eat a stack of Oreos and then have a quick peek in the toilet.  Yup, REALLY dark stuff in there.  I remember the first time my son had an oreo cookie he was in diapers (in a previous century) and that’s where I learned about the “Oreo Syndrome.”

So I’m pleased to tell you that I cancelled my doctor’s appointment and the receptionist was cracking up and couldn’t wait to tell the lady who works with her.

I’m assuming you’r3 seated.

Take a sheet of paper and get a pen.

Now, raise your right foot and make clockwise circles with your foot. While you’re doing that, write the number 6 on that piece of paper.

Could you do it?

Nobody can! When your foot is going clockwise – everything’s gotta go clockwise.

It’s the weirdest feeling isn’t it. You’re telling the pen to write a 6 and how freakin difficult is that?

Anyway, that’s my fun for today.

I suppose a smoker wouldn’t worry about the ceiling any more than they’d worry about the warning on a cigarette pack.  Smoking isn’t funny but this room is! 

After my recent problems with my computer and wordpress, I often felt like Costello when talking to the computer people!

Imagine how the conversation would go when Costello goes to Abbott to buy a new computer.

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: Thanks I’m setting up an office in my den and I’m thinking about buying a computer.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name’s Lou.

ABBOTT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don’t own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name’s Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO: I don’t know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.

COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.

COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let’s just say I’m sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

ABBOTT: Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue ‘W’.

COSTELLO: I’m going to click your blue ‘w’ if you don’t start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: That’s right. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What’s bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT: Yes.. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One copy.

COSTELLO: Isn’t it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few days later)

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on ‘START’……….…